Lately I’ve been catching myself being really hard on myself. Kindness towards others seems to come more natural than shining a bit of that understanding and compassion back to me.
But at least a decade’s worth of research shows that people who are self-compassionate are happier (not a big surprise!), have better life satisfaction, have more motivation, better relationships and less depression and anxiety!
Yes please on all of those things!
The research also shows that those with greater self-compassion have more resiliency to cope with life’s stressful events. Ahem…educators returning to in person teaching during a global pandemic with very vague plans from the government and powers that be on what this will look like (at least where I am at the time of writing this!). If self-compassion can give me some more resilience and less anxiety then sign me up!
If only it was that easy. But just like most things in life, self compassion takes practice. Dr. Kristen Neff is the guru on self-compassion. Her website has some great resources many of them free. But the best practice tip for me is mindfully acknowledging the pain or the feeling in an akward moment and treating ourselves as we would a friend. Easy to say, simple to do but a challenging pattern of behaviour to develop.
This past week thanks to a good friend I realized I wasn’t being very kind to myself. I share my thoughts in this 4ish minute video below.
How self-compassionate you are? Take this quick 26 question quiz to find out. Also there are a number of exercises provided to help you improve your self-compassion skills!
What did you find out? Are you a self-compassion guru? Or could you use a little more practice in this area? I’d love to hear from you! Send me an email and let me know where you are on the self-compassion scale and how are you practicing getting better at it!
Do you know someone who is often very hard on themselves and could benefit from this information? Please share with them! We need to be kind not only to others but to ourselves to get through this life!
Throw kindness around like confetti!